Confessions of a First Year Teacher

After about 10 months, I’m finally feeling some time to breathe. One more week left of being a “first year teacher!” What a journey. To be honest, the first 4-5 months are just a big blur, but from what I can remember, those months were good too. I made it.

And wow. God is good. God is always, always good. Even if this year would have brought heartache and misery, God would still have been good. I’ve been blessed more than I deserve, and I thank God for his good gifts this year. To actually pinpoint one or two lessons I’ve learned throughout these ten months has proven much too difficult. So, therefore, I’ll take the typical millennial approach and write a blog about my experiences. Real original, I know.

Lesson 1: You can’t do it all.
Trust me on this. I think I tried. (Part of the reason I don’t remember the first 4-5 months, probably.) When I first started teaching, I woke up at 5, tried to do my devotions, taught all day, coached volleyball in the afternoon, went to the gym, ate a little, then went to sleep, and repeated that day in and day out. When I think back on those months, I get a little overwhelmed at myself. I remember wondering how teachers actually had lives – like husbands, kids, actual prepared meals. It was an anomaly to me. Well, actually, it still is. But the Lord has shown me that I don’t have to do it all. Seek FIRST his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. My happiest days this year were days that I spent in close communication with Jesus. Not when I had a souped-up lesson plan or a pinterest-y project for the kids. I was happiest when I sought the Lord the most. I hope I’ll always remember that.

Lesson 2: I am a Church Member.
This year has brought new changes. New church, new ministry, new home. With that said, I have learned, and am still learning, how to be a young, single church member. This was my first true experience of church without my family. Reading Thom Rainer’s book “I am Church Member” really brought to my attention the need for Biblical church members, single or not. Church shouldn’t be about my preferences and desires. Church shouldn’t be about ME at all. Biblical church membership is not what the church can do for me, but what I can do for the church. To be honest, sometimes after an exhausting day or week, going to church doesn’t always sound the most appealing. But, just last week, I looked around at everyone socializing before church, and just got really thankful for the body of Christ. Church is a pretty cool thing. I think I’ll keep going.

Lesson 3: Everyone Needs Accountability.
All sin is based on rebellion and disobedience. End of story. Sin is looking to temporal rather than eternal pleasures. God is a good God and desires good things for his children. I’m still trying to get that through my head. God is a good God. God is a good God. If it doesn’t have God in it, I shouldn’t want it. Since this year is the first year on my own, I’ve seen how I can get numb to sin. I can overlook things as if they aren’t rebellious or anti-God. But all sin is. Maybe growing up in a pastor’s family, I’ve trained my mind to think that if I sin, I just have to try harder next time. Never tell anyone; just move forward. This year I’ve learned that won’t solve the root issue. All sin is a really big deal. It shouldn’t be glossed over. I praise God for the friends placed in my life for this season that sharpen me and keep me accountable. It’s shown me, for probably the first time in my life, that I’m not alone in my struggles and I have a God is willing to meet me wherever I am.  Everyone needs accountability.   Even the grownups.

For the sake of time, here are a few other vital lessons I’ve learned this year:

4. Sleeping past your alarm when you actually have a real job is the worst feeling ever.
5. If you don’t wash the dishes, they don’t get washed.
6. Bills don’t pay themselves.
7. Petting a puppy is something I totally took advantage of before.
8. You have to actually plan meals if you want to cook.
9. Everything costs money.
10. I need 8 hours of sleep every night to function properly.
11. Don’t dwell on the fact that your states away from any sort of family member. It gets overwhelming.
12. Kids are some of the funniest, most creative people on the planet.
13. A child’s hug can touch hearts.
14. Never start a netflix show unless you’re okay with being unproductive for the next few weeks.
15. Calling my mom always makes me feel a little better.
16. Northern Florida is actually the deep south. Who knew.
17. Tallahassee has introduced me to Krispy Kremes and Tropical Smoothies. That is all.
18. Dolphins are my new favorite animal.
19. Grocery shopping is overrated. Chick-Fil-A is better and, since I’m a Christian, I always have a coupon.
20. Pray about everything.

 

Love God, Love People

 

Matthew 22:37-39 says, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.  This is the first and greatest commandment.  And the second is like it:  love your neighbor as yourself.”

Love God.  Love People.

Pretty easy right?  To say tonight’s simple message touched me deeply in an understatement.  The tears started early in the night as the missionaries walked down the center aisle and everyone stood applauding their servitude.  The long-awaited Global Impact Celebration (GIC) was off with a bang.

I’m not sure why I got teary eyed as I watched these people of all different ages walk down the aisle.  Some were young; some were old.  Some had children; others had already raised their children on the mission field and were left wearing grey hair as a crown of splendor (Prov. 16:31).  But all had something in common.  They all gave up their lives to fulfill their part in the Great Commission.  They consider the souls of others worthy of the cost.

I was teary eyed through most of the service, but it got worse when the speaker started giving testimonies of those touched by missionaries.

Stories of Muslims finding the one true God.  A little boy with malaria being restored to health. A crippled boy walking again. A prostitute knowing the true love of Jesus.  An orphan finding his heavenly Father.

Let the redeemed of the Lord say so! (Psalm 107:2)

Why do these missionaries leave their homes, their families, and their comfort to share the gospel?  Because they love God and they love people.  Praise God there are Christians in the world who do believe the souls of others are worth the risks and the sacrifices.  Praise God that one missionary planted a seed in a Muslim man that has now reached hundreds of other muslims to Christ.  Praise God for the countless other faith stories that wouldn’t be possible without missionaries.

At the end of the service, Pastor Ray asked the missionaries to stand in the front of the auditorium.  Normally, at missions conferences, we would pray for them and ask God’s blessings over them as they go to different parts of the world.  But tonight was different.  He invited us up to be prayed for. What a blessing to be prayed over by heroes of the faith.  I truly covet those prayers.

As the music started playing and the invitation was given, I walked forward with tears in my eyes.  I was prayed over by a missionary women from Brazil.  Lord, thank you for her prayers.  I want to have her faith.

But as she finished praying, I noticed two little girls behind me watching us.  Two of my 3rd graders had seen me walk up and followed me there.  They watched as I cried and watched as we prayed.  My immediate reaction was to hug them and walk back to our seats, but I truly felt the Holy Spirit tug on my heart.  So I asked the lady if she would pray again. This time for my little girls.

Then the tears really started coming.  I got to hug my girls as a beautiful prayer was prayed over them. What a sweet moment with Jesus. Lord, thank you for those prayers.  I want these girls to have that kind of faith.

The pastor then ended with a final thought.  Although salvation is free, discipleship is not.  I pray that I find it worth the cost.

Matthew 16:24-25  

“Then Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.”

A Canvas for His Grace

Last year I took a class at Bucknell, and every week we would talk about “lessons that didn’t work.” I felt like a champ in these classes.  I mean, yes, I had a few lessons that weren’t great, but student teaching was a breeze.  I got the glory for the teaching, and Mrs. K took the rap for everything else.  Pretty sweet gig.  Oh, if only I could be invited back to that class…

I now could not only offer my fair share of “lessons that didn’t work,” but I could also offer some insight on parties that didn’t work, e-mails that didn’t work, meetings that didn’t work, games that didn’t work, snacks that didn’t work, etc.  Catch my drift?

This year has been a year of learning, and today I learned one of the most eye-opening lessons that will hopefully change the way I teach.  Up to this point I never had a student that tested my patience so much.  I’ve never had a student that brought me to my knees so much.  But about a month ago, a little girl walked into my classroom that has done just that.  She’s questioned my tolerance, patience and overall integrity as a teacher.  But do you know the funny part of that?  She is totally unaware.  Between her laughs, her smiles, and her all-too-frequent question if she can get a drink from the water fountain, she has no idea that she is changing the way I see my profession.  And for that, I thank her.

To be honest with you, how much and how often this little girl gets off-task truly amazes me.  I give her directions, step away, and somehow between the brief moment I step away and the moment I return, her pencil is down and she’s picking up pencil shavings from the carpet.  Lord, give me strength.

Then I have those moments where I think, “I just have to make it 15 more minutes.  Then the kids go to PE and I can just have a small break.”  It’s about right then that the intercom noisily interrupts the class to announce that “Teachers, there will be no PE today.  Thank you.”  Suddenly my 15 minutes turns into 5 hours.  Lord, give me strength.

I’ve noticed that if my little girl is picking up pencil shavings during the morning hours (approximately 8 am – 10 am), then I just gently correct, “Sweetheart, get back to your seat.  You have work to do.”  Then in the afternoon hours (approximately 10 am – 12 pm), I find myself correcting with a little more force.  “You have so much work to do.  You must stay in your seat.”  By the late afternoon hours (approximately 12 pm – 3 pm), I find myself just repeating the word “FOCUS” in a stern and serious voice.  But no matter how many times I try to keep her focused, I find that precious girl looking at the underside of her chair or counting the dots in the ceiling.  Lord, give me strength.

I have carried on this vicious, daily cycle for about a month now.  But today, I overheard some of the kids call that little girl “dumb.”  Did you catch that? They called her dumb.  How did they come to this conclusion?  What gave them a reason to say this?  They should have no idea how she does academically.  They don’t know how she does academically! They’ve never seen her grades.

But do you know what they do see?  They do see their teacher’s frustration level rise as the day goes on.  They hear her impatience with that little girl.  And those kids can read body language better than anyone.  Oh, Lord give me strength.

I hope and pray that this little child of God never thinks she’s dumb.  I hope and pray that this little child of God never feels that her teacher doesn’t believe in her.  I hope and pray that she will see the love and patience of God through me.  Oh, Lord give me strength.

As I stood in my classroom with tears in my eyes, I realized what a responsibility and privilege I have with these kids.  Shouldn’t I be glad God doesn’t raise his voice in frustration at me?  As I constantly get side tracked by what this world offers, and even stoop so low as to pick up pencil shavings from the ground, I am so thankful that I don’t get belittled by the voice of God saying “focus!”

Instead, I’m met by the grace of God.   He meets me where I am, side-tracked and staring at the ceiling.

Lord, give me strength. I have so much to learn as a teacher.  Let my weakness be a vessel for your power and my flaws a canvas for your grace.

Elijah Strikes Again

I’m ready to get my thoughts out for one of the last parts of the Elijah story!  And what better day to do it then a snow day. That’s right. I move to Florida and get a snow day.  I would move here just in time for a record setting winter.  This was NOT in the pamphlet, people.

Last time, Elijah was preparing the altar so, to put it simply, God could SHOW UP and SHOW OFF.  When the altar was soaked and ready for fire, Elijah did what Elijah does best.  He prayed. And if there’s one thing I’ve learned it’s that prayerful lives are powerful lives! In 1 Kings 18:37 Elijah prays, “O LORD, answer me, so these people will know that you, O LORD, are God, and that you are turning their hearts back again.”  Again, this reminds me that our prayers are not for our own glorification.  God answers prayers so that HE might be glorified.

And glorified He was.

“Then the fire of the LORD fell and burned up the sacrifice the wood, the stones and the soil, and also licked up the water in the trench.  When all the people saw this, they fell prostrate and cried ‘The LORD – he is God! The LORD – he is God!” (vs. 38-39).

Way to go, Elijah.  You made God a big deal.

Then, telling Ahab (Yes – evil, evil Ahab) that the sound of rain is coming, Elijah did not gloat or celebrate or patronize.  He simply “…climbed to the top of Carmel, bent down to the ground and put his face between his knees” (vs. 42). He prayed again.  This time, for rain.  And do you know what this showed me?

1.  Well-developed faith results in well-defined prayers, and well-defined prayers results in a well-defined life” (Mark Batterson, The Circle Maker). God doesn’t answer vague prayers.  Elijah knew specifically what he wanted as he stared at Carmel’s dirt.  He wanted rain.  And He knew his Father in Heaven could provide it.    The more specific your prayers are, the more glory God receives.  And isn’t that the point of prayer?  But Elijah just didn’t pray once.  And this is where I learned another lesson.

2.  Pray through.  What would have happened if the Joshua and the priests stopped circling Jericho on the 6th day?  What if they got discouraged and quit?  Unfortunately, they might have forfeited a great victory.  In the same way, what if Elijah had stopped praying the 6th time?  What if he got discouraged and quit?  Unfortunately, he might have forfeited a great miracle.  The only way we can fail is if we stop praying.  Pray hard. Pray through.  Remember the story of the widow who drove the judge crazy because she wouldn’t stop knocking?  God honored her persistence.  And God is still in the business of honoring bold, persistent prayers.  On the 7th prayer, God didn’t just send Elijah a few showers.  He sent a “terrific rainstorm” (vs. 45).  Pray through.  God is listening.

BUT, of course, this crazy story isn’t even over just yet!

Verse 46 says, “The power of the LORD came upon Elijah and, tucking his cloak into his belt, he ran ahead of Ahab all the way to Jezreel.”

Excuse me?  Ahab was in a chariot. A chariot! And Elijah ran ahead of him.  Good thing he tucked his cloak in.  I hate when I’m running and trip over my cloak.

You’ve taught me a lot, Elijah.  Thank you for your bold prayers, your fearless faith, and your willing obedience. I pray that this story always means as much to me as it has in the past few weeks.

Elijah Round 2

So I can’t stop thinking about Elijah.

I was going to wait for another post, but my mind keeps thinking about the story and I want to be sure to get my thoughts in writing before they escape my teeny tiny brain.

Last time, we left Elijah hiding from Ahab in the widow’s home (which is located in Jezebel’s home town nonetheless. Oh the irony).  Chapter 18 starts out with another “Word from the Lord” to Elijah.  And, just like our man, Elijah obeyed.  He was to go see Ahab (Yes – evil, evil Ahab) so rain would come to the land.  Leaving the widow’s home, he journeyed on to meet another believer, Obadiah, who was in charge of Ahab’s palace.

Oh, Obadiah. I love how Obadiah is so real in this story.  Maybe I shouldn’t pick favorites in a Bible story but, he’s a pretty genuine dude. I bet he could win “Best Supporting Actor.” Yes, he was a “devout believer” and yes, he hid a hundred prophets from Jezebel’s wrath, but he was also scared to death when he saw Elijah.  He was no dummy.  He knew Ahab wanted Elijah’s head, and he didn’t want to risk being in the crossfire.  But what makes Obadiah really cool is that he obeyed.  He risked it.   He went to Ahab.

Round of applause for Obe and his faithful obedience.

And now comes the part we’ve all been waiting for..

When I first told my kids Elijah went to Mount “Carmel,” we had to take about a 2 minute interlude to laugh at the name.  But their attention was captured shortly after, because what kid doesn’t like hearing about a good contest? And that’s just what Elijah did.  He prepared two altars:  one for Baal and one for the LORD.

1 Kings 18:22 says, “Then Elijah said to them, ‘I am the only one of the Lord’s prophets left, but Baal has four hundred and fifty prophets…. Then you call on the name of your god, and I will call on the name of the LORD.  The god who answers by fire – he is God.”

As I was teaching this, I had previously read the night before a quote that caught my attention.  I love how God constantly fills my Bible lessons with parallels to my own personal devotions.  So, ready for lesson number one?

1.  You + God = The Majority.  I bet Elijah was a little nervous.  I mean, really, what human wouldn’t be nervous standing up against everyone?  Literally everyone.  But you know what made the difference? Elijah had God on his side.  He let faith dictate his actions instead of fear. Romans 8:31 says, “If God is for us then who can be against us?”  Such an elementary yet profound truth. Lord, that I may live accordingly!

Now back to the story…

The prophets of Baal began their little ceremony.  They cried, prayed and shouted to Baal to send fire to their altar with no avail (obviously). Elijah even teased and taunted them a little.  (When I told my kids that, one of them asked me if that was mean/sinful.  Miss Ruba is still a little unsure of that answer…)

Then it was Elijah’s turn.  But, unlike the prophet’s of Baal, Elijah’s altar to the Lord was surrounded by a trench of water and flooded with four large jars of water.  (One my of kids also asked where all that water came from if they were in a drought for three years.  Miss Ruba is also unsure of that one. Sorry, kids.) But on the plus side, this is where I realized lesson number 2.

2.  Faith is the willingness to act foolish.  I was reading in Mark Batterson’s book “All In” and it touched on this very subject.  As I was reading Elijah’s story to my kids, my heart was so full as I thought of the parallels.  Batterson wrote, “Noah looked foolish building an ark in a desert.  Sarah looked foolish buying maternity clothes at ninety.  The Israelite army looked foolish marching around Jericho blowing trumpets.  David looked foolish attacking a giant with a slingshot.  The Wise Men looked foolish following a star to Timbuktu.  And Jesus looked foolish hanging half naked on a cross.”  And we all know the results of those stories, don’t we?  So you pour that water, Elijah!  Let people mock you.  Let the theoretical become the experiential.  Let God prove himself to his people.

Elijah

I’ve officially made it half way through my first year teaching!  Some things have changed; some things haven’t changed at all.  For starters, I still don’t understand the King James Version and it blows my mind that my 3rd graders memorize it so well.  But on the plus side, I’ve mastered the art of multi-tasking pretty well.  I can answer e-mails, discipline one child, listen to the question of another child, calm down a third child…all while taking attendance and sipping my morning coffee. Kudos, I know. 

And although you couldn’t pay me to be a first year teacher again, I’m also thankful for this time of learning.  The past two weeks we’ve been going through the story of Elijah.  I could honestly write a book about how much I’ve learned through these stories.  Did I know the story before?  Yeah, kind of.  But for some reason, this time it took on a whole new meaning for me.  Maybe it was because I was the one teaching it, or maybe it was because the Lord knew what I needed to learn.  Either way, I’m loving the story! My personal devotions were running parallel to it, and I truly think God spoke to my heart more than ever before. Where to even begin???

Let’s go back to the beginning of the story.  The part where Ahab becomes King of Israel. “Ahab did more to provoke the Lord, the God of Israel, to anger than did all the kings of Israel before him.”  Yikes.  Ahab is no bueno. And this is where my first lesson was learned.  

1.  God will never let his people remain in sin.  This is where my man Elijah comes in.  He prayed for no rain, and the Lord honored it.  So now Israel, in all its wickedness, will have “neither dew nor rain in the next few years.”  Talk about a wake up call.  BUT I love how the Lord provided for Elijah via the brook of Kerith and the widow.  And this is where my first parallel came in!  I had been reading in my devotions how, in Psalm 84:11, “No good thing to He withhold from those who walk uprightly.”  And also in Lamentations 3 where it says, “The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him.”  God looked after Elijah because of his obedience.  Elijah boldly told King Ahab (evil, evil King Ahab) that it would not rain.  This fearless, faithful obedience is what started it all.  All the sweet miracles and crazy answered prayers. And so, here comes lesson number 2.

2.  Obedience honors God and God honors obedience.  I was reading the book “All In” by Mark Batterson, and yes, the Bible PROMISES us that God does not withhold good things from the obedient.  The key being: the obedient.  I need to position myself for the favor of God by acting in obedience!  Thank you Elijah for being an example of this.  He positioned himself for favor by  trusting that the Lord would provide safety from Ahab and food for the widow and himself.  He also trusted that God would honor his prayers to bring the widow’s son back to life! He prayed and prayed, even stretched his body over the boy, storming the gates of heaven in boldness.  And God heard his prayer and healed the boy!  It’s not over yet, though.  Here’s yet another lesson I learned:

3.  God answers prayers to bring glory to His name.  After Elijah showed the widow her son, the woman said “Now I know that you are a man of God and that the word of the Lord from your mouth is truth.”  She believed.  Glory was brought to His name.  Not Elijah’s.  Glory to GOD! I found myself praying like God’s chief objective is my own personal comfort.  Well, wake up call…It’s not.  The goal of prayer isn’t independence from God, it’s codependence on God. 

 

And with that little book of a blog post, I’ll end for the day.  And sadly, this just touches on the lessons I learned.  The coolest part of the story is yet to come! I found it so hard to articulate what the Lord was speaking to me, but I’m so glad it’s written in words so I don’t forget how He touched my heart.  Amen?

Praying Circles

“Well-developed faith results in well-defined prayers, and well-defined prayers result in a well-lived life.”

Lord, help me to trust in you more every day.  Help me to not be like the Israelites who said, “We never see anything but this manna!” (Numbers 11:6)  They complained in the middle of a miracle.  In the middle of God moving.  Help me not to overlook your provision and miracles in my life.  Help me see how you work in my life every day, all day.  I want to see you more! Draw me to my knees, Jesus.

Going strong

Week 5 down and going strong!  I officially have made it 5 weeks of teaching third grade.  I’ve made it through stranglings (yes…that says stranglings), laughs, tears, 15 hours days, volleyball tournaments, sore throats, sleepless nights and many many prayers.  So thankful for the Lord’s provision.

Through this all, I’ve come to believe that I think Jesus has given me Jess for such a special purpose.  We were talking the other night and discussing what a confusing season of life this is.  It’s hard to feel like we belong anywhere.  It’s hard to feel used here.  It’s hard to know what step is next.  But all those questions and honest soul searching led us to have a night of prayer for one another.  There’s something so sweet about pouring your heart out to Jesus through watered eyes and a shaky voice. One verse stuck out to us, and that is Phillipians 4:12:  “I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.” If the Lord has not given it to me, (whether that be a husband, money or a huge group of friends), then I don’t need it right now.  Lord, give me the grace to have a spirit of contentment!

I was reading in a book this week that “we usually focus on what we’re doing or where we’re going, but God’s primary concern is who we’re becoming in the process.  We talk about ‘doing’ the will of God, but the will of God has much to do with ‘being’ than ‘doing.’ (The Circle Maker).” This season of life has proven to be so wonderful.  Do you know why?  Not necessarily because I love my job or my bank account (ha!), but because it’s brought me to my knees. Jesus knew that was what I needed.

Far More

It’s been almost four weeks now since I’ve moved to Florida.  What an adventure it’s been!  I feel like I haven’t truly had time to process all the changes that have occurred, but I’m thankful for a morning like this where I can sit outside, hear the birds chirp, and listen for God’s still voice in the midst of all of life’s chaos.

Where to even begin?  First of all, I do LOVE teaching.  Third grade has been wonderful, and I pray that I can only get better as their teacher as time goes on.  I have so much to learn, but I’m grateful for God’s grace that keeps me going each day.  Last Wednesday, during the weekly chapel time, the kids were signing “Here is our King” with all the adorable motions included.  I looked around, and couldn’t help but get teary eyed.  Hundreds of kids, arms lifted high, signing “Majesty!”  Does it get more powerful than that? 

I’ve also realized that I also love the Bible memorization  the kids have to do.  Sometimes I think the Lord uses it more for my heart. This week it was Ephesians 3:20-21:

“Now to him that is able to exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or imagine, according to the power that worketh in us.  Unto Him be the glory in the church throughout all ages, world without end. Amen.”

I need more?  Jesus can give it.  How? Through the power that is IN me.  I love Charles Spurgeon commentary on this verse.  He wrote:

Now, I see, also, that if my case is very special, still I need not tremble or stand in dread of need. What if I require superabundant Grace? I may have it! If I need exceedingly abundant help, I can have it. Ah, if I need more Grace than I dare ask for, I can have it! Yes, and if I require more than I think, I may have it, for still my Lord is able to give it to me, and what He is able to do, He is willing to do. What comfort this should afford even to poor sinners who are far away from God. He is able to give you great forgiveness for the greatest possible sin! Sins that you have not yet thought of, He can pardon! Do but come to God in Christ Jesus and you shall find Him able to save to the uttermost. If this little hint is taken up by some despairing heart, it may give it immediate peace! It cannot be true that God cannot forgive, for in Christ Jesus, ‘He is able to do exceedingly abundantly above what we ask or even think.’ (Spurgeon, Charles. Paul’s Doxology.)

I am always so encouraged, standing in front of 18 kids every morning saying this verse, that where ever I am, whether Florida or Pennsylvania, God hears my prayers.  In fact, he is able to exceedingly abundantly above my prayers.  Oh Lord, help me to claim the promises you’ve shown me.  Let me cling to the power at work within me.

And finally, I want to touch on one more lesson I’ve learned these last four weeks. A lesson that I truly felt like the Lord himself showed me.

I was driving home the other day, and just got really overwhelmed.  I questioned myself and my abilities.  I questioned why I’m here.  I questioned if these kids are even learning, and if they would be better off with another teacher.  I questioned why no one has told me that I did a good job.  Because if I was, then wouldn’t everyone notice? 

But then, I truly feel like God spoke to me.  Galatians 1:10 “For I am now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.”  I need to daily remind myself that I am not here for me, I am not here for others, I am here for Christ.  If I please him, then I am blessed.  Let me borrow the cliche saying, “I am working for an audience of one.”

Lord, let your opinion of me be the only thing that matters for you truly are “Majesty.”

 

 

Don’t Look Back

This morning I read about those two, cute little cities we all know and love:  Sodom and Gomorrah.  Okay, so they weren’t so cute. More like sinful and totally immoral? Probably the more appropriate adjectives here.

But what stuck out to me the most was Lot’s wife.  In Luke 17:32, Jesus himself said “Remember Lot’s wife.” Why is she so important to remember?  In Genesis 19 I read how God wanted to destroy Sodom and Gomorrah because of their immorality, but he also chose to spare Lot and his family.  Genesis 19:17 says, “And as they brought them (Lot’s family) out, one (angel) said, ‘Escape your life.  Do not look back or stop anywhere in the valley.  Escape to the hills, lest you be swept away.”  

But here’s the real kicker. Dear Mrs. Lot did look back and probably regretted that decision as she was turning into a pillar of salt.  Seems kind of harsh for doing something that I’m guilty of also.  Was she wanting to go back to her sinful past?  Was she missing her immoral friends? Longing for the comfort of home instead of trusting in God’s provision?

Just as Jesus has shown me mercy through salvation, Lot’s wife too was shown mercy and spared that day.  Yet, we both forget to trust and obey the one who has saved us.  How often do I return to my sin, despite the fact that I’ve been completely saved from it?  How often do I forget God’s faithfulness and question my position in Him?  How often do I flat out disobey him and turn away?

Less than a month until I move and have this awesome opportunity to look forward and trust in Jesus.  Far greater things lie ahead, and I want to fully put my trust in obedience in the one who saved me.  So, when Jesus asks that question in Luke:  “Remember Lot’s wife?” (Luke 17:32).  I can honestly say yes! I do! And Lord, please keep from that kind of disbelief.  I want to trust in you.

Luke 17:33 “Whoever tries to keep his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life will preserve it.”